"譯場(su)報告" * On Translating *
No.66, 2008年4月14日; 2008/1/28 創刊
Jacques Barzun名著From Dawn to Decadence:1500 to the present, 500 years of Western Culture Life , Harper Collin 2000
有兩翻譯版本:
《從黎明到衰頹》鄭明萱譯,台北:貓頭鷹,2004。
《從黎明到衰落:西方文化生活五百年 1500至今》林華譯,北京:世界知識出版社,2002,注釋、索引從缺。
【此處兩本翻譯各有些問題,下次再談。貓頭鷹版之注解,年代打錯。】
現在我們要談第412頁的一小段
One Exchange in Boswell has perpetuated the myth about his prose: Johnson utters a terse epigram and immediately translates into Ramblerese.* It was play of mind and may well have been a joke on himself.
以及它的注解和相關的三本翻譯上的「議題」。原注:
*p.412
Ramblerese. Johnson said first:” It has not enough wit to keep it sweet,” and at once rephrased it:” It has not vitality enough to keep it from putrefaction.” The remark referred to the Duke of Buckingham’s The Rehearsal. The anecdote is in Boswell,
Jacques Barzun 從1400頁中選出這段來評論是相當有趣而富「洞識力」的:主要是當時Johnson 已75歲,身體很不舒適,隔年即過世。所以Barzun 說這些發言是他的「(自諷)警句」 (epigram)。他唯一的問題是原文有些不同、日期引錯,應該是1874年6月19日(牛津大學 Life of Johnson 第1312頁:He seems to take a pleasure in speaking his own style; for when he had carelessly missed it, he would repeat the thought translated into it. Talking of the Comedy of The Rehearsal, he said, ‘ It has not enough wit to keep it sweet.’ This was easy; he therefore caught himself , and pronounced a more rounded sentence; 'It has not vitality enough to preserve it from putrefaction', ..
「他似乎以他自己的風度與人談話為樂。當他不介意而沒有把話講到點子上時,他慣常再說一遍,以另一種方法表達本來的意圖。談到《預演》的喜劇性時,他說道,”這劇沒有足以令人回味無窮的機智。”這句話是隨便脫口而出的,因此他住嘴,而講出一句更不客氣的話:”它沒有充足的氣韻和生動性,不能傳之久遠。” 」(约翰逊博士传) 王增澄,史美骅 合译 :上海三联书店, 2006,pp.229-30)
hc評:”這劇沒有足以令人回味無窮的機智。”和”它沒有充足的氣韻和生動性,不能傳之久遠。”很好,其他翻譯問題多多:句子多冗長。《預演的喜劇》才對。”rounded sentence”指的「說法」(用字和發音更長而響亮、嘴型更圓等),不是「更不客氣的話」。
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