2017年3月15日 星期三

The Sense of Sight. On a Degas bronze of a dancer by John Berger (1960) 三翻譯版本的討論

建議張華兄將此英詩打出來,方便討論 (複習詩歌與力學名詞的誤譯:此詩台灣和中國各有翻譯)
詩歌談的對象之圖示,請參考:
Edgar Degas
GRANDE ARABESQUE, TROISIÈME TEMPS (拍賣商的照片,可能是第2板本。台灣版本有第三版本照片,我的原著和中國翻譯本都無圖片。)



Edgar Degas

GRANDE ARABESQUE, TROISIÈME TEMPS

The Sense of Sight - Page 158 - Google Books Result

John Berger - 2011 - ‎Art
John Berger. Think in terms of bridges. See, the road of leg ... Dead LoadLive Load And Longitudinal Drag. So let the bridge this dancer arches for us Stand the ...



~~~


謝張華兄
預計下午講堂要講三個人-三家出版社。(移至週日,所以忙點。然後讀John Berg的重要書評,由此篇,可知The Sense of Sight的中國三聯版【講故事的人】2009!,比台灣麥田版【觀看的視界】2010更晚 (我錯了,三聯本先),它知道皇冠出版社1988年的翻譯本 )

兩書在  Part VII THE UNMADE ROAD 都翻譯錯誤
【講故事的人】:未修築的路
【觀看的視界】:未竟之路

British (of a road) without a hard, smooth surface.
‘they reached a stretch of unmade road’
https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/unmade

路不硬、不平,或許可稱為"坎坷之路"。


所以我傍晚再將此首詩的三翻譯比較討論---譯藝 blog。

~~~~
中國版不知道Dead LoadLive Load等等是力學用語,所以翻譯錯誤!


【講故事的人】:死亡之路,生活之路 / 以及縱向阻力  
【觀看的視界】:靜載重,活載重 / 以及縱向阻力  
張華:活載重、死載重 /還有軸向的拉力。



On a Degas bronze of a dancer
John Berger
You say leg supports the body
But have you never seen
The seed in the ankle
        Whence the body grows?

You say (if you are the builder of birdges
I think you are) each pose
Must have its natural equilbrium
But have you never seen
Recalcitrant muscels of dancers
        Hold their unatural own?

You say (if as rational
As I hope you are) the biped's evolution
Was accomplished longe ago
But have you nevr seen
The still miraculous sign
A little in from the hip
Predicting nine inches below
        Bodies fork in two?

Then let us look together
(We who both know
Light's the go-between
Of space and time)
Let us look at this figure
To verify
        I am Goddess
        And you the stress.

Think in terms of bridges.
See, the road of leg and back
Hingeing at hip and shoulder
Holds firm from palm to heel
Single leg as pier
Thigh above the knee
Cantilivering member.

Think in terms of bridges
Over what men once called Lethe.
See, the oridinary body we cross through
Vulnerable, inhabited, warm
Stands the strain too.
Dead Load, Live Load
And longitudinal Drag.

So let the bridge this dancer arches for us
Stand the strain of all old prejudice
So let's verify again
        You my goddess

        And I the stress.
~~~


譯詩一首
詠 竇加的舞者銅像
約翰‧伯格/張華譯 2017.3.4
你說腿支撐身體
但你是否從未看出
身體是從足踝裡
的種子長出來?
你說(假設你是那造橋人
我想你是)每一個姿勢
都要達到自然的平衡
但你是否從未看出
舞者倔強的肌肉
支撐著他們違反自然的姿勢?
你說(假設你如同
我希望般理性)兩足動物早已
進化完成多時
但你是否從未看出
那依然奇蹟般的記號
從臀部微微往內
預告著再往下九吋
身體將分叉為二?
接著讓我們再一起來看
(我們都知道
光線是
空間與時間的媒介)
讓我們看著這雕像
來證明
我是女神
而你是應力。
且把它想像成橋。
看,那腿背形成的道路
在臀部和肩部鉸接
把手掌到腳踝牢牢連成一體
單腳如橋墩
大腿下接膝部
懸臂著的構件。
且把它想像成橋
跨過人類一度命名為忘川的河流。
看,我們穿越而過的平凡橋體
有病痛、有人住、有溫度
還要承受應變。
活載重、死載重
還有軸向的拉力。
就讓這舞者為我們彎拱成橋
承受一切古老偏見的應變
讓我們再次證明,
你是我的女神
而我是應力。
注: 本詩用了大量結構名詞:hinge (鉸接)、cantiliver (懸臂)、dead load (靜載重)、live load (活載重)、stress (應力)、strain(應變),作者大概想利用結構名詞傳達人生的磨難:"應力" 指物體受到外力時產生的對應力、"應變" 指物體受到外力後的變形例如扭曲。dead load正式中譯避諱 "死" 字改為 "靜載重" 或 "呆載重",為使原文字義明顯,依字面恢復為 "死載重"。
On a Degas bronze of a dancer
John Berger
You say leg supports the body
But have you never seen
The seed in the ankle
whence the body grows?
You say (if you are the builder of birdges
I think you are) each pose
Must have its natural equilbrium
But have you never seen
Recalcitrant muscels of dancers
Hold their unatural own?
You say (if as rational
As I hope you are) the biped's evolution
Was accomplished longe ago
But have you nevr seen
The still miraculous sign
A little in from the hip
Predicting nine inches below
Bodies fork in two?
Then let us look together
(We who both know
Light's the go-between
Of space and time)
Let us look at this figure
To verify
I am Goddess
And you the stress.
Think in terms of bridges.
See, the road of leg and back
Hingeing at hip and shoulder
Holds firm from palm to heel
Single leg as pier
Thigh above the knee
Cantilivering member.
Think in terms of bridges
Over what men once called Lethe.
See, the oridinary body we cross through
Vulnerable, inhabited, warm
Stands the strain too.
Dead Load, Live Load
And longitudinal Drag.
So let the bridge this dancer arches for us
Stand the strain of all old prejudice
So let's verify again
You my goddess
And I the stress.



Tonight's Art Moment is "Grande Arabesque, Third Time" by Edgar Degas. The figure in this bronze is performing a static pose known as a grand arabesque that served as a test of the strength and balance of the dancer. The uneven surfaces of the bronze can be related to the Impressionist interest in unfinished painting effects. Degas made nearly 200 sculptures, all with wax on wire armatures mounted in wood. With rare exceptions, these were private, experimental works that were not intended for public exhibition, and many represented different ballet positions. Degas did not cast his sculptures in bronze during his lifetime, and it was not until 1919, two years after his death, that 73 wax sculptures were cast in bronze by the Parisian firm of Hébrard. On view in the Bloch Galleries.




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